Caught my grandmother masturbating… obviously I’ll have to kill us both
The Lord works in hilarious ways
Just boiled my dog and ate him. And I wasn't even hungry
I accuse my parents
Was Mr. Rogers the world's first tele-pedophile?
I’m in such a good mood today I might even aim for the bowl
Currently messing with Texas...
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Luckily for me, “Nymphomaniac” is too long to fit on my daughter’s license plate
Surprisingly, Edward Scissorhands is a very gentle lover
The only mail I ever get is bills and poison cupcakes from the neighborhood kids
Why do you think this guy holding us at gunpoint is forcing
us to dig a grave?
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